I am a web designer from Toronto.
I recently got my own copy of the school agenda book from OCAD University—which is the art and design school I’m attending this year—and this was one of the guidelines published within. I thought it was funny (and true for the most part), so I’m posting it here.
Kudos goes out to the OCAD Student Union for making such a well-designed, not to mention highly entertaining, agenda book.
Here it is verbatim:
At first glance one is likely to say to themselves, “Wow, what a bunch of hipsters.” The truth is, we’re not hipsters, we’re the people hip have been trying to emulate. OCAD faculty, by means of an interview process hand picks certain kinds of students. By the time we arrive at OCAD U the majority of us fit into one of the following denominations:
- DO-IT-YOURSELFERS: This rag-tag group is pretty easy to spot; self-patched clothing and homemade jewelry or accessories such as woolen hats and scarves. These are the most likely people to give you a birthday present so make sure you share your favourite colour with them, else you end up with a pair of beige woolen mittens.
- THRIFTIES: If you’re having a hard time spotting these folks, think to yourself, “What would my grandpa wear if he were my age?” Floral patterns and paisley are key to any thrifty’s heart. These are the people most likely to be seen on campus with a fedora or a pair of leather shoes. They’re also the most likely to be seen in a Goodwill or Value Village.
- FASHION CENTRIC: Essentially the living, breathing American Apparel ad, the fashion centric are the most likely on campus to have clean and pressed clothing. As every article of clothing, down to the socks, is obviously fresh from a designer sweatshop, your first superficial crush at OCAD U is surely going to be one of these kids. You’ll either learn to dig a little deeper in your affections or you’ll be surprised to find a great person under that fashionista exterior.
- VEGANS: A disproportionate amount of OCAD U’s vegans have dreadlocks, so they’re pretty easy to find. Another way to tell if someone is vegan is the hemp accessories and clothing. If you’re trying to impress one of them, refrain from wearing that leather jacket, then hold the bacon at Karine’s. A common mistake at OCAD is offering the kid with the dreadlocks your joint before offering it to anyone else. Don’t just assume they’re into Rasta culture, start with a conversation on the environment or something. If you’re looking for these kids outside of school, try Kensington Park.
- ACCIDENTAL “HIPSTER”: Though they definitely can’t be called a “hipster”, they sure as hell look like one! Don’t be fooled by the plaid flannel shirt, thick-framed glasses and bicycle cap; these kids are simply victims of circumstance. Sure they’re likely to be seen at a house party drinking tall cans of Pabst, but that’s just cause it’s cheap, okay?!